Read the blog post version of this week’s episode here!
>> Carlee: Are household chores driving you absolutely crazy? We'll find out in this episode of The Stress Less Show. Hi I'm Carlee Meyers and I'm a stress management expert. One thing I hear day in and day out is that we feel like we've tried everything when it comes to stress management. We may have tried the mainstream approaches to managing our stress but have we really tried to get to the root of it- To the root of the issue. Each episode I bring on experts and leaders to not just put a Band-Aid on your stress but to actually get to the root. This month, we have been focusing on the theme of family obligations and responsibilities. And specifically I brought on an amazing guest expert Sarah Grace to talk about household chores. Sarah Grace is the founder of Embrace Your Space: New York City, I love all of the rhyming that's happening there, and she specializes in residential organizing for individuals. What's really unique about Sarah is that she's the creator of the revolutionary revolutionary break up organizing method that supports individuals in reclaiming their physical space after any type of significant life loss. So whether it's ending a relationship, a romantic relationship, losing a loved one or even transitioning from one job to another. She is your lady. Welcome to the show Sarah.
>> Sarah: Thank you so much for having me. It's great to connect with you. Carlee.
>> Carlee: Thank you yes. So I'm really curious because you have such a unique perspective on household chores and organizing. How did you get into this line of work?
>> Sarah: Yes so I'm so excited to be speaking with you and your listeners today because one of the top reasons people call me is because they feel that their home has gotten out of control and they can't seem to get a handle on the constant tasks and chores required to keep their home in order. So I'm excited to share that with you. But my beginning in the world of organizing was a little bit different. I've always done organizing for myself and for friends. It's always something I've really enjoyed and found to be kind of cathartic and calming. My first career was in teaching and I started organizing on the side, kind of as a hobby. And then it became a side hustle. And it became a business for me only once I realized that the organizing went beyond just the stuff and I found it to be a really powerful tool in helping me move past a devastating breakup. And I think that there are many stories like this. People find ways through their pain with many different tools. For some people it's exercise or changing careers or going on a vacation from their bucket list or moving to a new place. But for me, it was the simple act of reclaiming my space and learning to make decisions about what I wanted to surround myself with and how I wanted to design my life and that really helped me emerge from a really dark time with some clarity and confidence. So that's how it went from being a hobby to being kind of a calling for me. And thankfully a successful business.
>> Carlee: Yeah and it sounds like you're helping people find themselves amongst like amongst this huge transition and amongst all of their things as well.
>> Sarah: Yeah it's kind of like a ripple effect. We start on the very concrete, making those decisions, and it really ripples out into many areas of our lives and we emerge from it feeling like we kind of know who we are, what we want, and how to take action in that direction.
>> Carlee: So speaking of concrete, we talked about the tips that you wanted to offer my audience before we jumped on the show here. I think your first tip is really sharing concrete.
>> Sarah: Yeah. So my first tip for you is let it out. We are walking around with so much bottled in and juggling so much inside of us. So start by just getting out of your mind and onto paper. And so just do a basic brain dump and list out the answer to these three questions. What needs to be done? How often? And by whom? And that's the first step. Very simple.
>> Carlee: Yeah. And it's getting like that brain fog and that chaos out of your mind and making it more concrete. I love that.
>> Sarah: Right. It's often more complicated in our minds and when we get it down onto paper, it can be more simple.
>> Carlee: Yes. And I love that you're asking who is responsible because it doesn't always have to be us.
>> Sarah: Right. Right we think it does. But it doesn't always have to be.
>> Carlee: Yes. Great. So once we get through and we write down, we braindump or we create the list. What's next?
>> Sarah: The next step is to make a plan. One of my favorite authors Gretchen Rubin. She writes about habits and happiness and she likes to say that things that can happen at any time are often done at no time. And this definitely shows up a lot when it comes to household chores right because we're putting these things off not because they're hard but because they're not particularly urgent. So an antidote to that is to have a plan and to automate it. So I tell my clients to chunk the tasks or the chores by batching like with like and then making it a routine by scheduling it into your calendar and of course, sticking to that. So for some people this may look like designating a day for each type of chore like doing laundry on Sundays or errands on Wednesdays. Or you could turn it into like a morning and evening routine. More of a daily habit. But the key is to be efficient with your time and energy by chunking together the similar tasks and then really making it an expectation and a routine so that you don't have to psych yourself up every time. Things need to get done, it just becomes habitual.
>> Carlee: Yeah. And this reminds me of a colleague who I used to work with her and her partner. Every Sunday they would they had the routine where they would wake up and they would make pancakes. And I forget exactly what they called it but I'm thinking like party and pancakes or something like that or it was basically like Pancakes and Cleaning. But it sounded really cool. And they would just get up and they would start their day that way and then go through and clean the house together and they have like one of the most spectacular houses around because they have that routine.
>> Sarah: I love that. One of the questions I asked my client when we start a session is how can we make this easy and fun. Because it doesn't have to be a chore. It doesn't have to be difficult and there are ways to lighten it up and make it feel fun like putting some music on or opening some wine or having pancakes. I love that. I think that's brilliant.
>> Carlee: Yeah. So making it more fun. That's what this is reminding me of those those Facebook videos or social media videos where there's the - I don't know if you've seen it - the guy who like shows just what it's like to like dance and clean at the same time and they're really funny. But he like switches twice and then like shakes you know shakes his body and then like is cleaning to the beat. But like that's a really - it's really funny to watch but it's also like a really great example for how to make it, make it fun and make it feel easy even if it's something you don't really wanna be doing.
>> Sarah: Absolutely.
>> Carlee: So what other tips do you have in terms of making it easy and fun? So music is I think many of our go tos. Is there something, are there any other things that we could do to make it easy and fun?
>> Sarah: Yes. So that's part of my third tip which is keep it simple. And the thing is that we humans have a tendency to make things more complicated than they need to be. And what if instead we let go of that need for things to be hard and simply allowed for the possibility that chores can be easy and fun. So, some of the things to try are set a timer for 15 minutes and when that timer goes off you're done. Or an alternative to that would be setting, putting like three upbeat positive songs on and when those are over, your chores are done. If you have kids or other people in the household. Get them involved by gameifying it or turning it into a competition. That often makes the time go by faster. One of the things I do is I will call a friend or one of my parents and just you know catch up with them while I'm putting clothes away. So I'm multitasking and accomplishing a lot. And then the other thing is ask yourself what you could outsource. We think that we often have to do everything and that's not always the case. So when you have gotten your, Let you let it out, you've made a plan. Think about what should these things... Can somebody else do better than me.
>> Carlee: And you know what's funny is when you talked about bringing like family in into the picture I just heard a story two days I think it was two days ago about from a friend of mine who when he was a kid his mom used to say I'll pay you a dollar a minute if you massage my feet. And he was joking. He's like one hundred and forty five minutes later she said no more. But it is like when we gameify or we create incentive or We... I love engaging the competitive side. My partner and I have actually like timed how quickly we can unload the dishwasher when we do
>> Sarah: I love that.
>> Carlee: Yeah. So when we're doing that it makes it so much more fun. But where can we, so those of us who are interested in learning more about your work. Where can we find you?
>> Sarah: I am on social media at Embrace Your Space NYC. My website is EmbraceYourSpaceNYC.com. And people can always e-mail me as well at Sara. S A R A H at Embrace your space NYC dot com.
>> Carlee: Perfect. Thank you so much, Sarah, for being on the show.
>> Sarah: Thank you so much for having me.
>> Carlee: OK. So this concludes this episode of The Stress Less Show. This episode was sponsored by The Stress Less Space. It's located at 16th and Walnut in Philadelphia, PA. The Stress Less Space is the ultimate lady cave for women to relax and recharge away from the chaos of everyday life. We'll see you next week on the show.