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>> Carlee: Do you find yourself running away from stress? In this episode of The Stress Less Show, we take an alternative approach. We tackle how to increase your capacity to handle stress. Rather than avoid it. I'm Carlee Meyers, a stress management expert. And one thing I hear day in and day out is that we feel like we've tried everything when it comes to stress management. We may have tried the mainstream approaches to managing our stress, but have we really gotten to the root of the issue? Each episode, I bring on experts and leaders to not just put a Band-Aid on your stress but to actually get to the root of the issue. This month, we're focused on physical health. It's one of the top stressors in the United States and specifically I brought in an expert to talk about increasing your capacity to handle stress. I'm going to welcome my dear friend Nick to the show. He's a fitness and nutrition coach who helps people build better relationships with their bodies through education and empowerment. He competes in national- natural bodybuilding, plays multiple instruments, and is a complete nerd. I can vouch for that, especially for all things health and functional medicine. So welcome to the show, Nick.
>> Nick: Thank you so much. Carlee. I am happy to be here.
>> Carlee: So I was told before that before we hopped on the show that you have the answer. Do you want to share a little bit more about what this answer might be?
>> Nick: I'd love to. It's been a lot. It was a long time coming. So you know I've been doing this for quite a while now. And so when I was younger, when I was a kid you know I started getting the fitness and just like recognizing all the things that come along with like, "oh wow I can change my body" And so, I had this epiphany that you could change your body in countless ways. And so... All the adults around my my life like they were out of shape and not healthy. And you know I stumbled upon this epiphany and then so I started getting the fitness. And so I realized you could change your body and how it looked, how it felt, how it performed and just all manners of... all manner of speaking and so. You know through training and proper nutrition and lifestyle, you know, I've just all of a sudden felt empowered. And so I got deep into it and I started going down the rabbit hole and like, you know. As you said like I'm a super nerd. So I read all the books and was just like trying to get my hands on anything I could. And so you know while I was running around, you know, looking for the perfect food, I was looking for the perfect diet, the perfect exercise, perfect training program. And it's like, all that nonsense right. And I tried like all of it. As well. As soon as I found something new I was like, "Oh wait, like that might work. That makes sense let me go do that right?" Because if it doesn't pass through the filter of my body it's it's worthless.
>> Carlee: Sounds like shiny object syndrome a little bit.
>> Nick: A little. I mean I would have done anything right. It's kind of like yeah for me to get like leaner and mean more muscular and just like have complete mastery of my body. It's like, "OK I have to eat dirt. Like how much, you know like you just whatever"
>> Carlee: I'm a worm now. That's it.
>> Nick: Exactly right. So you know. Sometime along the way, I was already working in fitness at the time. I started venturing out of the area and actually going to meet some of the people that I look up to and so I went out to one of the first seminars that I'd gone to in fitness and all that. It was out in Ohio took a rent a car out there and I was super stoked just that it was like driving distance. And so it was this bunch of dudes that nobody knows who... But they were celebrities to me. Right? And there was one. There's a couple presentations there, they all kind of had like this congruency to what they were saying. You know the first guy kind of like. You know smacked me across the face face with it. And. And. And in that weekend is when I realized how simple it was and my direction completely changed and I was like, "Wait, It's all about managing stress right?" I was looking for this the perfect diet and the perfect food and all these things outside of me. And I was looking for the wizard, I was looking for the sensei, I was looking for all these people outside to show me the answer. And I was like, "Oh, we already have it inside of us, as cliche as that sounds right, but it's really like our response to what it is that we're putting in like the input. Whether it's food whether it's exercise, you know whatever it is. That's what determines whether or not we change and how we change. And so that was that was the big epiphany. You know.
>> Carlee: It's reminds me of something I heard once which is that. It's kind of like. We all know what we. We all know like all of the options that we have like that we need to do to like lose weight or get fit or do whatever or manage our stress or get the job but the... It's about like Yeah but is that... Am I committed to that? Is is that right for me? It's like this... It's all internal. Like it doesn't matter that you have this menu of options. If you're internally not committed or internally not ready or internally overwhelmed already.
>> Nick: Completely. Everything works.
>> Carlee: Yeah.
>> Nick: But are you ready for it. Yeah.
>> Carlee: That's. That feels good. So I know you have some recommendations on how to... The answer is simple, but it's also a little complicated in some ways. So you have some tips on how to...
>> Nick: Yeah so. So I think it would be best to start with just like talking a little bit about how my view of stress changed and I think overall you know we tend to have a negative view of stress. And that. That mindset is what prevents us from seeing all of its positive side effects. But we gotta understand stress itself is really just our adaptive response to the changes in the world around us. Right? And so that nasty feeling of stress, when we talk about stress like that nasty feeling like you know that feeling right before we start ugly crying? Right.
>> Carlee: Yeah.
>> Nick: It's really just overwhelm. It's too much stress, it's an excess of stress, it's too much stimulation. And so that's when the changes to the environment have surpassed our ability to deal with them. Right. Just too much. So I think we need to understand that like stress is first unavoidable. Like. It's not. So there's this stress researcher back like in the early 20th century, Hans Selye, so this is where all stress stuff comes from. And so he said, it's not stress that kills us, it's our reaction to it. Right so it is indeed all inside of us. And so so stress itself is unavoidable especially hidden in chronic stress because. If we have a stimulus, but it's constant, our bodies just ignore it. So we start layering all this stress that we no longer become aware of and it weighs us down. Right. And so the problem with that is that chronic stress can ruin our health. And so this is. This is where a lot of the medical recommendations come from these days were just chronic stress is such an issue. So. When we are under stress, we release stress hormones to overcome the stressor which is that that's the goal to overcome it, but sometimes they don't go away like constant financial stress, emotional stress. And this has all kinds of terrible things associated with it like you know. As a woman, you know it disrupts your menstrual cycle. It disrupts digestion which can lead to malnutrition and even IBS, irritable bowel syndrome, because you're not a... you're not digesting and assimilating the foods that are coming into you. Right. So that's important. Cortisol itself depresses immune function so you become more susceptible to infection. But an infection... Immune function is something else and that's really important to it as well. That is the basis of our adaptive response, so it disrupts healing and adaptation. So if you're training, you're doing exercise where you're even just trying to grow and get better as a human, like that that ruins that. And so it even has effects in just pulling the brain down as well. So it disrupts mood, it disrupts motivation which means social engagement goes down, your relationships will suffer. You might even notice like you know if you're really stressed out like you have a hard time remembering names like brain, all you know focus goes down, cognition all that kind of stuff. So so stress is bad for health. Right.
>> Carlee: At the risk of being a drama queen stress is ruining our lives
>> Nick: Drastically. It really is. But. So. Like I said the stress is what happens inside not outside. So it's inside our head and it's really just perception right. So the response to stress won't change until our beliefs change. And so this is all sort in part of your brain called the amygdala and this is where we store fears based on past experiences. And so anytime something happens to you like all the sensory inputs, they go here first to determine whether this is stressful or not subconsciously. Before you even know it's happening. So this is why because it's subconscious. This is why like changing the mindset, changing the belief system is really important first. Right. So because the brain is comparative it's like, "hey is this is this better or worse? Is it more is it less? Is it safer is it is it more threatening?" Right. So instead we want to think about stress as an opportunity, like it's just stimulation you know. Possibly in excess of our capabilities and that's what makes it exciting. Like it it arouses us. Right. But so, you know. We want to think about it as an opportunity to to grow and so there's there's research out there by. This doctor, Dr. Crumb and one of the things that comes up with that is. You know. We can't always avoid stressors. So avoiding them will help will make us miss the opportunities to grow. Instead we can optimize the stress response and focus on adapting to our stressors essentially like. Go to the thing that makes you stressed out and go win. Right? If. It's if it's something that's chronic then we just want to remove that. So. Looking at it in this new way we want to think about this and you know instead of avoiding stress we want increase our capacity to handle it increase the bucket and all of a sudden the thing that used to stress you out. Isn't stressful anymore. One of the ways we can do that is just by going to the gym and getting stronger. Right. If we identify and we remove our chronic stressors or at least interrupt them with breathing and mindfulness exercises then we. We regain our choice to be able to like control our reaction to it. Right.
>> Carlee: It's peace of months amongst the chaos. And also when you're talking about the gym it's. You might be stressed out every time you go up the stairs but if you're training to handle stress the next time you go up the stairs its not gonna be so bad.
>> Nick: Totally.
>> Carlee: Yeah.
>> Nick: The whole thing.
>> Carlee: So I know that you wanted to offer the opportunity for people to learn more. So how do we how do we find you?
>> Nick: Sure. So. So I coach clients online and in Philadelphia. And so if you'd like to build a sustainable approach to improving your health and body together with me, I offer a complimentary consultation. So if you want to sign up for that. Go ahead and shoot me an email at coachnick@nickdeaconfitness.com and definitely add me on Facebook and Instagram. On Facebook, I'm @AreYouTheNickDeacon and Instagram @NickDeaconFitness. I share deep stuff like this all the time, and I just love talking about it.
>> Carlee: Yes I love it please. Absolutely. Hit Nick up on that offer. He is a wonder. He's amazing. I can't tell you how great his energy is and his work is so important. So that concludes this episode of The Stress Less Show. We'll see you next. Next week on the show where we talk about emotional eating and how to use food as fuel instead of something to take the edge off. All right. Take care.